Starving Artists (2012) - a poem

My fingers shake, so I curl them into fists,

But I have no strength now to fight.

My head is pounding like a battle drum,

As I close my eyes against the light.

To distract myself I compose lists,

And sort boxes of faded memories,

But my stomach churns, my body numb,

This will not pass with ease.

 

Crippled slowly, I come to understand,

It is my heart that starves me so.

Bottling away what I cannot control,

It leaves me feeling weak and low.

I am strong, so I should demand,

That my mind and body are free,

I must bargain for my parole,

The right to be, once again, me.

 

Food. Sleep. Peace. Tranquillity.

I long for things now so far out of reach.

And truth. You elude me too, my friend,

And all the lessons you would teach.

I am now ravenous for a chance to be,

Secure and safe without this fear,

But hunger, my will you easily bend,

And all I do is cry another tear.

 

Truth (2012) - a poem

I ask for no gestures of grandeur,

Nor declarations of love undying.

I want no proof of your heart’s desire,

Only that you stop the lying.

 

I need no gifts of silver or gold,

Nor bouquets of many hues.

I only ask that you speak truly,

And my trust you do not abuse.

 

I desire no letters of lover’s words,

Nor to hear your voice each day.

I only wish those soft tones of yours,

Are true in what they say.

 

I do not care if you have flaws unseen,

Or a complicated past.

I only pray you are true to me,

So this romance can last.

 

 

The heart is shaped like a fist.

The heart is shaped like a fist...
And when you grab me by the wrist,
And spin me around, throw me down,
Every time I see that frown,
I tell myself it is your heart
And you have loved me from the start.

So hug me until I cannot breathe,
Because without you I would grieve.
So kiss me until I'm freshly sown,
Bleeding is better that being alone.
So love me until I break clean in two,
I don't want to be without you.

It is so easy for “Them” to criticise,
To see my outward scars and patronise,
“They” say I'm stupid for taking you back,
But it is not intelligence that I lack.
It is the strength to stand on my own.
It is the courage to fight the world all alone.


I don't expect “Them” to understand
The love I feel when you hold my hand.
When you say sorry, and never again,
I have to hope, it keeps me sane.
“They” might believe in God or Fate,
Well, I believe this will someday abate.

Closed the door

My love is no longer the same,
And now my regard is no more.
All because of a single word,
You spoke as you closed the door.

I did not believe it possible,
The heart could come to die,
All because I heard the tone,
In which you said “goodbye”.

Life's too short (a poem)

A very short poem, written in 2012.

Life's too short to live and die,
Say hello then weep goodbye,
When you face the fear of death,
Is when you take your first real breath.

Never Say It - a poem

Written in 2007.

I hear the music within your chest,
Where I lay my weary head for rest.
I smell the life on your smooth skin,
As I cuddle up to you and give in.
I see the smile playing on your lips,
As I tease you, gently swaying my hips.
I taste the vibrancy as I kiss you again,
Those kisses that drive me so insane.
I feel the soft breeze of your breathe,
So do not say it, never mention death.

I will never leave your heart or mind,
I will never leave my man behind,
I will never make you turn away,
And night will never take the day.
You will never say goodbye,
You will never make me cry.
I will never leave your side,
The moon will never turn the tide.
You will never call me just a friend,
And this budding romance will never end.

Never say it, never believe it to be true,
Do not say that I'll ever be parted from you.
No matter the situation, the way it comes to be,
I never want there to be an end for you and me.
No finishing line or closing scene,
No reminiscing about what has been.
No saying goodbye, see you around,
No laying one of us in the ground,
No ending to something with such start,
Never say it, never believe that'll we'll part...

In My Memory - a poem

Written following the death of my grandmother, Margaret Williams (1920-1997).

Stay with me,
A little longer.
Help me be,
A little stronger.
When I give,
Into the night,
Please do live,
And hold me tight.

So long ago,
And far away,
Whispers low,
End a bright day.

See through skin,
And bright blue veins,
Fingers thin,
Now no one gains,
From your words.
And wisdom true.
Pastries and Curds.
Memories of you.

Yards of wool,
Sheets of smooth silk,
Knowledge full,
Flour, Sugar, and Milk.
Hunched back,
And familiar eyes.

Buttons, Threads and Dyes.
Memories of you.
You live on,
In my memory.
I am strong,
Because you’re part of me.